19 weeks

Well, we are almost at the half-way point.  Time is just flying by.  I am loving the 2nd trimester :)  I feel great most of the time and I have decided feeling him move inside of me is one of the most amazing things I've ever experienced.  I also love knowing he's a BOY!  I will never get tired of hearing Mitch pray before dinner and thank God for our son!  It makes my heart so happy.  I went to see Dr Holly yesterday and we got a good report.  So thankful each time I hear that heart beating so strong.  It was 152 bpm yesterday.  She thought everything was looking great.  We will go back to the perinatologist in 2 weeks since we get to see them every 4 weeks throughout the pregnancy.  I'm excited to see how much he's grown in that time.

We made our first trip to Babies R Us last weekend and have been doing lots of research online since there are so many options.  Thanks to the girls in Sunday School and my sister for sharing their wealth of knowledge and giving us tips.

Here are a few pictures.  I'd forgotten to load the 16 week picture, so it's out of order :)  Thank you for rejoicing with us and for continuing to pray for our little family!

16 weeks

Fun pics we took at our Gender Reveal Party, Blue or Pink?

There goes the Pink!

All Blue!

18 weeks

The Big Reveal!

Today we went for our appointment with the perinatologist.  He did our sonogram and confirmed that everything looked great!  We were very thankful to hear this!  It was so fun to see his/her little fingers and toes.  We told the Dr. that we wanted him to find out the gender, but not tell us.  Instead, we wanted him to seal the results in an envelope.  So, at certain times, he would have us close our eyes, to keep it a surprise.  The baby weighs 7oz and the heartrate was 155 beats per minute.  It's so amazing to think that all of that is going on inside of me. 

After we left the appointment, we took the envelope to the bakery and ordered a cake.  They baked us a layered cake and put either blue or pink filling inside.  Then all of our family came over at 7 and we were also able to Skype with Lesley in Minnesota.  We cut into the cake, and found out together what we're having...

This is the group that voted GIRL!

And this group voted BOY!

Pink and Blue Snacks & Drinks

The Reveal Cake

IT'S A BOY!

"Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you, before you were born I set you apart"

Jeremiah 1:5

15 weeks!

Well, it's hard to believe we've already passed the 15 week mark.  We had a great time celebrating the birth of our Saviour with friends and family.  My nausea and sickness got worse around 12-13 weeks which kept us from attending a few of the events.  We were sorry to miss out on those, but thankful for a good reason to have to miss.  Baby H felt the love this Christmas!  So many people are already showering him/her with gifts and we have quite the collection already!  Thank you so much for that! We rang in the New Year from the couch.  It was a cold and snowy day, and although my nausea was improving, I had gotten a head cold, so we decided it was best to stay in.  I took a nap from about 9-10pm, just so I could make it to midnight :) This baby is already changing our lives! We did go outside and take a 5 minute walk in the snow, it was so pretty! Since the first of the year I have been having more good days than bad.  I have several good days in a row and I think I'm in the clear, followed by several not so good days.  I am still thankful that it's getting better.  I no longer wear my sea bands. Yay!  Most foods sound and taste good again, which I'm very thankful for! I still have to be cautious about snacking throughout the day and not letting myself get hungry. 

I had my 15 week appointment with Dr. Holly last Friday. 

• I'm measuring at about 17 weeks, instead of 15.  This baby is already taking after his/her father!
• I've only gained 1 pound since my last appointment
• The heart rate was 120, so the baby was just resting instead of running around in there
• My blood type was A+, so no rhogam shot for me :)
• We are scheduled to see a perinatologist in 2 weeks since I'm considered high risk due to my age and my blood clotting disorders
• I felt my first flutter of the baby moving around and can't wait to feel it again!

Here are a few pictures that we've taken since the last update!  Enjoy!

11 week update

We went for our first OB appointment with Dr Holly Kaufman yesterday.  She said that everything is looking great so far.  We got to listen to the heartbeat again.  I never get tired of that sound!  The baby's heart was beating at 183 beats per minute.  I am still experiencing nausea and get tired pretty easy, but I am loving (almost) every minute of it :) We are still in awe of the gift God has given us! 

 My 10 week picture before we went to Mitch's company Christmas party.

My mom has made each of us a stocking.  This year "Baby Hancock" has a tiny stocking attached to mine hanging on their mantle.

This is the bassinet that has been on my dad's side of the family for about 42 years.  It has been passed down to us now. The bear inside was a gift from our neighbors when they found out we were expecting!

 This is the fun new shirt my mom bought for me to wear this Christmas!

We've been having so much fun telling our friends and family.  We've been waiting for this for a long time!

We were celebrating Ken's birthday and Debbie's was the week before, so we gave them a joint birthday gift.  Don't you love the look of shock and surprise on their faces! Mitch's brother, Michael and his wife Aimee, were there for our announcement.  Mitch's sister, Lesley, lives in Minnesota, so she watched the announcement via Skype then came home to visit over Thanksgiving.

Then we had Thanksgiving Dinner at Eddie & Megan's house a couple days later.  Our nephew, Owen, helped us share the news!  I made him this onesie and dressed him in it to announce our news to my immediate family.  It says, "I'm thankful for my new cousin arriving in July."  Then he wore it the rest of the day to share the news with all our relatives! I like how he looks excited in the picture, like he understands what's going on :)

The Cowley-Jarratt Crew

This is my 8 week picture on Thanksgiving

Our Story

Our Story….

Well, Mitch and I have much to be thankful for this year.  The most exciting thing is that we are expecting a baby in July, 2013!!  We are beyond excited for this gift from God.  I feel the need to tell you the rest of the story so that you will understand what a blessing this is. 

Mitch and I have been trying to start a family for just over 5 years now.  Infertility is a very painful and lonely journey, one that we would never have chosen, but God did.  These past 5 years have been a roller coaster ride of trusting God one minute to questioning His plan the next.   Why would He choose to withhold this gift of new life and yet give that gift to so many others, many who don’t even want or appreciate this gift? We don’t know the answer, and maybe we’ll never know.  We do know that God is never late, He is sovereign, and He loves us and has a plan for our lives! 

After years of tests, medicines, shots, multiple fertility specialists and procedures the doctors felt that IVF (in vitro fertilization) was our only chance of getting pregnant.  We prayed over this and felt at peace about moving forward with this in September, 2011.  This procedure didn’t work for us and it was devastating.  They did some follow up testing where they discovered I have a combination of 3 blood clotting disorders and suggested that maybe that’s why there was no implantation and the IVF failed.  We couldn’t bring ourselves to consider the process again for several months.  It was hard to think about going through all of that, all over again!  We consulted a 3^rd fertility specialist for another opinion who had a plan to try a couple new things which sounded promising to us.  So, we were planning to do our 2^nd IVF in July, but at the same time praying about the timing of it.  We asked God to let us know if this wasn’t the right time.  The next Sunday Pastor Kelly approached us about going on the upcoming mission trip to Mexico. I immediately knew, this was God’s answer.  It was the same time that we had the IVF procedure scheduled.  We prayed over this opportunity and felt God was asking us to trust and obey!  We canceled the appointments and started planning a trip to Mexico.  It was a blessing to us and hopefully God used us to bless others as well. 

After we came home we started the preparation for IVF.  This time I’d be required to be on nightly blood thinner shots in addition to the normal protocol.  Our procedure was scheduled for September, which again resulted in no pregnancy.  We are so grateful for our close friends and family who supported us, prayed for us and encouraged us in numerous ways.  The Wednesday before we found out that the procedure failed, I had a meltdown.  I just had a feeling that it wasn’t going to work. A friend called that morning to say she’d heard something on KLove on her way to work and felt God prompting her to call me with these lyrics from a song, “You don’t need to worry, You are right where I want you, You’re here in the palm of my hand” It was if the heavens opened and God spoke right to my heart, “Nicole, I’ve got this under control.”  How I needed to hear that! We were sad over the news, but somehow still had hope.  I guess when you believe in God, how can you not have hope? We didn’t really know where this left us. 

The day we found out that the procedure didn’t work, I was reading a new entry on a friend’s blog.  She was telling part of her story from the last several years of her journey as she waited on God for a husband and a family.  Here’s a paragraph from her blog post http://www.iwillgiveyoutherain.blogspot.com/

“I remember the night God came to me.  I remember which side of the bed I was lying on. I remember the way He captured my attention.  I remember my thoughts as if it was yesterday. I remember the request.   I remember the tears.  He had me, yes, but He wanted more of me!  And oh, I wrestled with the Lord, it would seem, for so many years! I had to learn the balance of offering up my earnest desire (for a husband and children) as a sacrifice to be burnt up completely, if He so pleased, and that of grabbing hold with firm grasp and loudly saying "I will not let go, except thou bless me" (Genesis 32:26).  One side sounds so resigned...the other so forceful!  One action can be racked with discouragement, the other with arrogance.  Does God really want to bless me?  Will I really receive greater gifts if I choose to give it all up?  If you have wrestled the Lord like that over any issue, you know exactly what I am talking about!  I had to learn to let go of my desire and cling to the One who gave me that desire in the first place!   He taught me, so beautifully, through the miraculous story of Sarah's barren womb bringing forth fruit in it's old age (through which would come Messiah) that when He places a desire deep in a heart—it is planted even deeper in His own!  He desires it more!”

What a painful, yet freeing thing to relinquish something and give it completely to God.  I was compelled to pray and let go of my own desires and trust that He who gave me this desire could be fully trusted with it.  Then a poem I had memorized years ago came to mind and I googled it to remember all the words. Turns out it wasn’t actually a poem, but lyrics from a song.

When the Dream Never Dies

Deep in my heart was an ember of longing
Kept warm by the flame of the desire
A dream held in secret I yearned to hold openly
Fanned by my hope into fire
It burned to such heat I could touch it no more
So I put it away and then closed up the door
Forever extinguishing all that would keep it alive
But the dream never dies

The Lord has done this for me
He has looked on me kindly
He has heard all my cries
He has given me back what I laid at His feet
It must be God
When the dream never dies

Isn't it just like the Lord to invite me
To put all my dreams in his hands
Forever releasing the grip that once held them
Forever surrendering my plans
And then when He's certain it's not born of men
He calls for the fire to rekindle again
And He asks me to know in my heart
What's not seen with my eyes
So the dreams never dies

It’s so amazing and humbling to see all the ways God chose to bring comfort and healing to our hearts.  In the weeks following we were talking about how we didn’t want to waste our days, always waiting for something.  We wanted to live intentionally and enjoy the many things we have been given already.  We didn’t want to look back on these years with regret. 

Towards the end of October I began to wonder what was going on with my body.  Could I be pregnant?  No, it’s not possible.  I hated to even take a pregnancy test, just to see another negative result.  I wrote it off as my body was just struggling to get back to normal after all the drugs that I’d been on the month before.  But as the days passed, I told myself I would test on November 1^st, if things were still not seeming normal.  Could I even entertain such thoughts??  November 1^st, I woke up before the alarm, took a pregnancy test….immediately the result was POSITIVE!! Complete shock!  I ran upstairs to find a “Happy Father’s Day” card I had bought for Mitch years ago.  I quickly signed it, dated it and took a picture of the pregnancy test.  Then I woke him up with the card.  He said, “Are you sure?” I showed him the pregnancy test!  We prayed and thanked God for the miracle He had given us.  It took a while for this to sink in.  I called the Dr.  He had me get blood work done to confirm.  My numbers were high, definitely pregnant.  He was having a hard time believing what was happening.  He wanted to do a scan to see if I was actually farther along, thinking that maybe there was just a delay with the IVF results.  He was having trouble wrapping his mind around our miracle J  I went in for a scan, which confirmed I was only 5 weeks pregnant and it was all God!  He wanted to do another scan the following week to confirm a heartbeat.  It was the most amazing thing to see that little heart beating and to be able to hear it.  115 beats per minute.  Now I’m really starting to believe this is happening!  What a gift. 

We’re sharing our story with you for a couple of reasons.  We want all glory to be given to God for what He has done and is going to continue to do in our lives. 

Ephesians 3:20  

Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, to Him be the glory!

We also want to be an encouragement to anyone who is dealing with infertility.  I pray this renews your hope! 

2 Corinthians 1:3-4

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.